Heart to heart.

I hope you understand me by listening to your inner voice

Like I did for you

Without paying any heed to any outer noise.

Self-evaluate your reactions.

If anybody got offended by my last post, it only means that either they were finding pleasure and validation in my pain, which by any means is toxic, or they are over-analysing what I write. In both the cases, they need to find their mental balance and stop being overly reactionary.

The above-mentioned post.

PS- I am not giving any explanation about my behaviour here as I do not owe it to anyone for what I write. I am just trying to reflect on people’s reactivity so that they can heal on their own by self-evaluation.

Beware of wrong kind of motivation.

Overly-motivational videos sometimes make you feel like you are the only one not doing good enough in life.

Use them with caution and only when you are willing to do something and are not depressed because believe it or not, it tends to depress you even further when you watch them talk about how one can “rise from the ashes” “go from rags to riches” “from blank to highly enlightened” with pure passion and courage and spirit. No people! Courage, spirit and passion are only a minor proportion of what is required to reach your destination. If everyone could attain everything based on mere passion which is actually only emotional power, each one on this planet would have been an achiever.

Where on the one hand, they are right to motivate others who need only motivation despite having every other thing required to reach a goal, on the other hand it can make one feel really weak who has no plan or target to achieve. One needs logic, grit and resources more than mere motivation. It’s like if you want to run a wheel, you need, first of all, wood or metal and tools and knowledge to assemble it to make it, rather than having a potential energy to be changed into kinetic one. One cannot make a wheel out of leaves or air or water merely with passion.

Kudos to those motivational speakers who talk about steps as well to attain your goals. They have in-depth knowledge of how things work and they talk with logic as well as emotions.

Poverty hits different.

They did not listen,

They never could..

Not that they were deaf

Their hunger was more important

They ran together in hundreds

Having no hearth to live in

Didn’t strike their mind what they could

And keeping a distance from their brethren

Was what they should.

Grief of death was big

Grief of living was bigger to contain

You live in beautiful houses

Spending time in luxury

You can understand that perception

It’s hard to feel their pain.

Life of majority.

Life feels strange.

Really strange…

I have not found it any other way;

Where you succumb to the daily hassles

Waking up every morning

Not knowing why you did so,

You become a magnet to robotic tasks,

Doing every single thing,

That you are supposed to do,

Be it expected by society or you.

You think that who do nothing

Are just useless n meaningless,

But do you realize that those same people

Are just doing what they want

And are not being played like you in a worldly mess?

Life is an opportunity for a few

Whose death they feel is nearing

What you do daily?

Just wasting it doing stuff

others find endearing?

You just waste it

Thinking that you have got eternity here

Living a meaningless life

Leaving everything you want to do

While in a wrong direction streering.

EGO-BREAK.

Some seem like having a brutal heart-break,

Don’t be confused,

It can only be an EGO-BREAK,

Many symptoms are quite similar,

Don’t be fooled.

Twin-flames love feels right..

We are so similar in many ways,

We can’t hurt the good ones, sometimes even the bad get the good side,

but won’t mind hurting anyone by hitting them with the truth or be distant to protect our sanity,

We have our reasons that we keep from the world,

We hide our emotions, emotions run deep but logic rules behaviour to stay away from others’ insanity,

Affectionate with the right ones, self-respect on top,

I show my sensibility to the whole world, hide my childlike nature,

You show your childlike nature to the world, hide your sensible nature,

We say what we mean and mean what we say,

straight to the point,

no mind games,

Wild at heart, mind dark and twisted,

Persona full of spark with the right ones and trusted,

Passion, anger, lust and love, the similar kind,

And that thirst for knowledge,

Must have been called wierdos by many

Who couldn’t understand,

Wanderers, unaware and not afraid of the uncertain,

Neither liking to control others, nor wanna be chained,

We just show and hide our natures differently,

Still too similar,

I think this is what is Twin Flames named.

That connection was not wrong,

That bond being natural thus right,

We are sentimental,

For understanding each-other we don’t have to fight.

I don’t care if the future is dark or bright,

I will still love you without expectations

Because I know this love is right.

WHAT STILLNESS OF MIND IS..

Neither hopeful about something nor hopeless, you just have to make peace with what is. Situations might and will change in the future but you cannot take the present for granted. What exists now is real, everything else is your thought. Once you commit to improve your present, be positive, love yourself, love your life the way it is, everything good begins to get attracted to you. But it does not mean that only desirable events will happen, even negative and bad experiences will add to your life. Being positive does not mean that you can have or attract nothing negative in life once you choose to be positive, it just means that whatever will happen you will accept and handle it. You don’t feel lost when you live in reality. You know anything and everything takes efforts and yet the results are neither guaranteed nor parmanent, you can just have a plan in your mind and work towards it. Yin and yang is the law of nature, i.e. two contradicting forces always co-exist, thus any situation has both the sides to it, it all depends on your psyche how you see it particularly and that’s where your mindset comes into play. Moreover, there is always an invisible side to everything, that’s the force that keeps every kind of energy moving; although you may take something as positive or negative but that kinetic force is the one that keeps on changing the dynamics between any two sides of anything, be it separating those forces or uniting them. Your mind is definitely the most powerful thing and can control that dynamic or prove to be that third force but sometimes you really have to bring that energy to stillness, and stop thinking about it too much because if you won’t stop trying to control your future, then your future will begin to control your mind in the present. So, try to observe stillness of mind. It helps a lot in chaos. Stillness of mind does not mean making it numb, being unable to think through things straight, it actually means thinking straight about what is, and not about what can be and what should be. Some people specifically meditate for it, but according to me, it’s all about your level of understanding and perception. It also enhances your level of self-control and vice-versa.

WHY THE GOOD ONES ALWAYS LEAVE

Now I understand why the good ones always leave.

Because their efforts are never matched; if ever they do, it’s scarce.

Because they put so much of good intentions for the other that they feel the void of having left with no energy for themselves.

Because they put up with so many discriminatory situations of which the other person wouldn’t put up with even the half.

Because they get so frustrated of ignorance and abandonment that they start doubting their own existence or worth.

Because they get so tired of giving that they are left with nothing to give anymore.

So, in the end, they leave, completely exhausted.

DEEP FEAR TEACHING ME SOMETHING.

“She will do anything to get you, I will do anything to see you happy” I say this to you in my mind a lot. An old wound inside of me has opened up so badly, I am feeling like being stabbed on it over and over again.

History is repeating itself. Somebody trying to snatch my love by hook or by crook and taking him away from me; me yelling, crying, and even dying. I, once knew mad love for which I tried to finish myself. I can’t even explain the feeling. It’s so intense. Though I can’t say you are mine, still I am more afraid than ever to lose you.

Why is it happening to me, daily I ask myself. What is life trying to teach me? I can’t talk about it to anyone, I really can’t explain and nobody can even understand and I don’t even want anyone to understand anything about me. I just want to know the why. Why the similar things are happening? Why a third person of similar nature has entered who can do almost anything to get you, and my trauma is attacking me from all the sides that that person will make you cut your all the ties with me in the future. It’s not my intuition, it’s actually my traumatic experience making me feel so afraid.

I feel perplexed a lot, still, I keep going with a smile on my face. I know I am a broken soul. But one thing is for sure, I’ll stand my ground no matter what; I’ll protect my self-respect no matter what; and I’ll choose letting go if I have to, no matter how hard it will be for me; and I’ll never try to get you no matter how much pain I’ll have to bear.

If I know my weakness, I know my strength too and this is what, I think, life is trying to teach me, that how I have to put back my pieces together alone, how to love selflessly, how to stay honest to myself, how to overcome my fears and how to heal my past traumas. I can’t show but I know.