You make me feel free.

You know how it feels to lose control?

I got to know that in those moments

When we could say anything with no bounds

No filter in our talks,

Or I say I found it more

When you made with your teeth those marks?

Pioneer of my own life.

I cannot explain this enough

how much I hate to be defensive

And explain my actions

As well as inaction..

Assume whatever

But keep it to yourself;

This is for whosoever

I came or will come into interaction;

I repeat

I owe nobody any explanation

For what I do

Or feel the need to show it off,

Although I may do it in fraction,

But I do everything to my standards’ satisfaction,

I steer my life in my own way,

I know what I did, doing and will do,

I don’t need from anybody else a single direction.

EID MUBARAK TO ALL ❤

EID AL FITR.. One of my most favourite festivals, a day n night bestowed with harmony, prayers and every pious feeling of oneness with the universe maker (you call him Allah, I just don’t use any word being apparently atheist). This festival has such feel good, peaceful vibes. Oh ! Not to forget to mention the feast. Last year we made sewaiyan (vermicelli cooked in milk n condensed milk alongwith dry fruits etc.) with other things (don’t want to mention).

Moreover, the importance of moon in it just raises the spiritual vibe to a whole new level.

Sadly, this year we could not celebrate due to a familial sorrow. But I hope that you celebrate it by heart and stay blessed.

Beware of wrong kind of motivation.

Overly-motivational videos sometimes make you feel like you are the only one not doing good enough in life.

Use them with caution and only when you are willing to do something and are not depressed because believe it or not, it tends to depress you even further when you watch them talk about how one can “rise from the ashes” “go from rags to riches” “from blank to highly enlightened” with pure passion and courage and spirit. No people! Courage, spirit and passion are only a minor proportion of what is required to reach your destination. If everyone could attain everything based on mere passion which is actually only emotional power, each one on this planet would have been an achiever.

Where on the one hand, they are right to motivate others who need only motivation despite having every other thing required to reach a goal, on the other hand it can make one feel really weak who has no plan or target to achieve. One needs logic, grit and resources more than mere motivation. It’s like if you want to run a wheel, you need, first of all, wood or metal and tools and knowledge to assemble it to make it, rather than having a potential energy to be changed into kinetic one. One cannot make a wheel out of leaves or air or water merely with passion.

Kudos to those motivational speakers who talk about steps as well to attain your goals. They have in-depth knowledge of how things work and they talk with logic as well as emotions.

A thought on Lockdown.

I think it will be better to extend lockdown but with better measures.
According to me, agricultural and industrial production should be increased by first of all, testing the lower strata of population i.e. daily wage workers for COVID-19 by the government and giving them temporary jobs in these two spheres where manual power is lacking these days while making the middle class strata stay under lockdown and imposing a special revenue on upper strata income on profit making after a certain income level.
I know it’s difficult to take such steps as the population is huge but it still can be done rather than staying disorganised during lockdown and yet extending it, putting all the pressure on the same very few frontliners. Moreover, final year medical students can also be encouraged to help by granting them stipends particularly for working in hospitals in lockdown days, and some people from the general public can be given responsibility for carrying on the duties of police (under the supervision of police, of course) specially for the purpose of keeping gathering of people anywhere under check.

I know India has a mixed structure of socialist and capitalist economy more tilted towards capitalism but socialist measures are the need of the hour.


A few of these steps have already been taken; I hope it can help.

Lightened off..

Not knowing

what’s on going

I know life wants me to keep enjoying

Every feeling

Every impulse I gain

Not wanting me to numb down

Needing me to love everything

Like, love, loss and pain

Stigmatic as I could be

About being so psychic

I know nothing like intuition now-a-days

Feeling free from that heavy load

I am stunned with the sensory relief

Though I am feeling everything

I am unburdened of intuitive grief.

Internal conflict.

A part of me feels guilty for being this much privileged,

A part of me really grateful for the same,

A part of me wants to be of immense service to others,

A part of me too emotional

In search of love fulfilment,

digging all the parts’ grave.

Personal Blog- Volcanic Temperament.

One of my biggest problems is that when I get bored, I get too bored. Literally nothing can satisfy me. It’s not a kind of mood swing. I just need something to do, apart from my normal and then I feel like there is nothing apart from my normal. And, it usually happens when I miss somebody. Anger and frustration gets mixed up, and I feel highly energetic and it becomes almost impossible to release that energy, both mental and physical. In such a situation, either I become impulsive doing anything and everything I want to say or do, or become repulsive to every single thing and person, doing nothing at all, thinking nothing, feeling just like a zombie. Generally, I have a good self-control but when I decide to lose it, this moment arises. But the thing to remember here is that the moment is temporary but what I say in those moments is something that I have been keeping to myself for way too longer than required; high self-control is to be blamed here for that. It’s like my temperament is like a volcano.

FIRST MEETING..

Oh..Now I understand what I am feeling,

And why I am feeling it today,

Exactly an year ago we met for the first time,

I in red and you in black,

I was happy, really happy to see you

Quarter past five was the time,

Your first words were Pi Hi,

“Oh so rhythmic” I thought 😂

Trying to gulp my laughter in a nick of time,

And then that cute cuddly hug,

I loved your friendly way,

Not finding any place in the cafe, so crowded,

You found some other place to reach,

Driving oh so slow intently,

Gleefully n gay,

Trust me, I love high speed driving

I was getting irritated but it was too awkward to say 😂

But how you were doing it, loud music, slow pace, goggles on, I simply loved your swaggy way,

And then you started testing my knowledge,

I knew the answers,

You wanted me to speak up but I hardly had anything else to say,

Let me digest that we have finally met

One year four months after chit-chatting n flirting

“Really this long??” My mind got to sway.

You were really really sweet,

A bit testing, opinionated and sensible too,

Why so like me? I just don’t say things and you do.

You and your black coffee,

I read the disappointment on your face

When I didn’t exchange our different coffee to taste,

I did it on purpose,

I wanted to test how you handle a disappointment,

Pretty good in that too,

I got it you don’t behave in haste.

I know you thought I was nervous

More than I could infer,

Though I was not and never with you,

My thoughts were running around observing you silently,

I was liking you so much

And your talk

And your smile in between was a comfort.

Ah..Then came the time to say goodbye,

First you on purpose, then me on purpose,

Insisted you to drop me at my place 😂

Dirty thoughts in your mind on the way,

And lots of laughter due to that in my headspace 🤣

“Yay.. nothing’s gonna happen,

What’s up in store about it after this,”

Was what was ruling my mind,

“Let’s not get intimate so early,

I don’t want this relation of that kind.”

But when the time came to part ways,

Right in front of my door,

And you just hugged and kissed me

Sweetly yet out of a sudden;

Oh man, did you evoke something in me,

I can’t describe it, that fire,

First meeting, sweet beginning, turned into something hot and me rudden.

But you remained a gentleman all throughtout the meeting,

And I did have to behave like a lady,

Yeah.. We had to,

Because there was nothing else we could do, not that we could never,

We could but not that day,

That day I didn’t know

But I got something for you,

Something to stay with me forever. ❤

KARMA TALKS

Karma said, “I take your intentions and actions, together as well as separately. I take my time. I notice you doing everything, thinking everything. I am neither negative, nor positive. Some people relate my name to a punishment. But I am much better than that. While I have given the worst punishments, I have also given great rewards; I give you what you deserve. You may forget what you do but I will make you realize what you did when the time will be right. Nobody praying for anything to go for or against anyone else in the name of Karma is going to get their desires fulfilled just because they prayed that way, infact I will consider their prayers as their intentions and will put the same kind of vibe in their life, so that they can understand what they did. The person prayed about will get only what they put efforts or thoughts for. I make everyone realize everything and it’s upto them to take the lesson or not. When they learn something from me and let go of the desire to fight against it, I move to other lessons. The thinkers, the doers, in every sense, have to get back what they give to the universe. Even when you die, your soul will get everything back in the future lives. Choose to live wisely. There is no escape from me. Generally, I am neutral, don’t be afraid of me, be afraid of yourself and your deeds, or do everything good and right for yourself and others to love me and yourself.”