Learn to know the difference between people going through a lot because of inevitable circumstances in their life And people suffering because of their own jealousy, envy, insecurities, ego, and misery.
You fool yourself, or should I say, they fool you, everytime you sympathise with the latter. The moment you elevate their ego, they leave you like you ain’t shit or give you crumbs to get you stuck in their Misery🔄Elevate Their Ego Loop.
I can only explain, choice is all yours. I can’t save others’ energy, nor I can deal with such people in the long run who are always into sympathising with inherently toxic people.
Just because some people do not use words that can make them look like a negative person, doesn’t mean they are not negative. Narcissists use this kind of facade the most.
People who are actually going through or have gone through some really rough time may not have expressed it in any way.
I like it when you are lonely. That is my favourite place for you. When we first meet if you make mention of feeling lonely, or send a self-pitying tweet decrying your loneliness then I am straight on to you. You may as well have taken a knife to your chest, slit it open […]
The exact thinking of a narcissist. I have not seen a single victim whose friends or family have not been reached by a narc or whom narc did not surround with his own friend circle. You can actually visualise a normal innocent person standing inside of a circle of a narc’s friends, unable to escape ever. The boundary of the enclosure is adjusted according to the behaviour of the victim. If the victim acts according to the narc, giving him all the narcissistic supply, then the area of the circle is widened, so that the victim can feel like having freedom. But be wary, it is just a false sense of freedom, the victim just doesn’t know where the boundary is set by the narc but slowly and steadily (which may take years) the victim starts feeling that something is wrong, like somebody is pushing triggering buttons and pulling emotional strings when the victim does anything with a free will. Some victims never get to know who that person is. Those who get to know are then discarded by the narc in ways incomprehensible and shocking ways (a different topic) to the victim like a rug got pulled out below the feet. If the victim is impressive to everyone but meek, coy and obedient to the narcissist, this is the perfect dynamic to the narc. If somebody does not show off or others do not know about their achievements, then discarding happens instantly. If somebody is impressive to others and the narc as well, then Love Bombing (a different topic) begins in the initial stages to attract the victim; in the later stages, to pull the victim back into that enclosure of narc and his flying monkeys. Beware, some so-called flying monkeys do not even know that they are being so. Some may be genuine people intricately manipulated by the narc and his similar narcissist allies (different topic). The victims do not get to know from where they are being attacked mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically as well, that’s gaslighting (different topic). Gaslighting the victim inside that enclosure is the perfect dynamic in which either narc can control the victim completely by giving a little bit of attention or affection by himself or by his flying monkeys here and there; or during devaluation the victim is called “crazy” or “psychopath” or “anti-social” or will be called names whatever can work to hit the psyche of the victim to make the victim feel lonely, that too, IN WAYS IN WHICH ANY THIRD PERSON CANNOT KNOW THAT IT’S THE NARC WHO IS SAYING ALL THAT (Hiding his identity during all the criminalistic and psychopathic activities is a narcissist’s biggest trait), and then all those flying monkeys are pulled back in order to make the victim that there is something wrong in their behaviour and to make the victim feel lonely. Even if the victim asks a few of the allies of narc on suspicion of something wrong happening, they try to shun off the victim’s voice and ask “WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU??” No wonder the victim will be called crazy for hundreds of times, but Never Publically because that will actually spoil the Fake Image maintained by the narcissist and those who have been helping him under the guise of his fake image will stop helping him for controlling the victim. The whole idea is to control the victim anyhow so that due to loneliness, the victim runs to the narcissist most of the times for support (or to his flying monkeys).
ADVICE:
●Take the cues of being manipulated. Observe when some of your near and dear ones begin to act out of their character that you used to know before.
●Observe keenly before and after what action of whom you get to have reactions from whom and with what tone.
●Observe who jokes in what tone at what time and who questions you about which things (what is unacceptable to you is the key here).
●VERY IMPORTANT: Talk to a trusted family member, as well as a friend, and if possible (which is the best option) talk to a psychotherapist ept in behavioural therapies and who knows about narcissism as well.
●Talk about it openly. Break the chain/circle created by the narcissist around you. Do not trust anyone unless and until somebody tells you the truth that you want to know. Test them by asking about things that you already know and you know that they also know, then you’ll know who is lying and is a part of that circle.
●Do not care about your image. They are still a very few people who maintain a fake image, and you are real. The world is quite big, you will find your tribe some day.
●Once you know who is the culprit and who are the allies, do not change your mind of removing those people from your life. The narcissist never changes as it is an incurable mental disease. Some fluctuations may occur with time and circumstances but that’s about it; the allies are either narcissists themselves, not that much to you though and even in case they are not narcs, they are not your well-wishers, they are narc’s friends, and those who became his allies under the guise of his innocense cannot be trusted as they can be easily manipulated by anyone and as a result can help anyone in manipulating you as well.
●Stay strong. It’s okay to be alone than being in a bad company. Weak people are often found in groups. Even if your precious time got ruined in the narcissistic cycle, it’s still better than ruining your whole life by going back to the same people undeserving of anything from your side.
I love it when narcissists Vent openly on social media, for a small fraction of time, it feels like tables have turned. The way the victims want to talk their heart out, wanting others to know what they are going through or have gone through, and still being unable to let it all out because the intensity of the abuse they feel is unmatched with any words or any expression of it, it finally feels, that the relentless banter or the self-expression or uncontrolled trail of arguments by the narcissists against the psychologists or against the people who want to enlighten others against narcissism and bullying, is the way of narcissists for venting it all out about what they have or had gone through.
But.. Let me clear this. It’s a HOAX. Narcissists never vent. They do not have that much emotional depth in them. They do not think straight about how others may or may not feel about them. Actually, narcissists have nothing to do with what effect they may have upon anyone because of their actions. They love to abuse secretly. All of their so-called venting out is just a form of manipulation, the manipulation for everyone to see how bad or evil is a psychologist who has been making innocent people aware of the nature of a narcissist, and the trial of manipulation of the psychologist himself/herself so that they may think that the narc is innocent. So, narcissists do not truly vent regarding the real implication of the word, they just make it look like venting to gather attention and divert others’ attention from the real venting of the victim(s).
Please learn and then teach your kids the meaning of accountability, otherwise they will grow up as narcissists who feel entitled to talk shit by going to anyone’s account and upon being called up for their psychopathy, will laugh and try to blame that person to whom they were meant to be accountable. I cannot even describe how much incapable they will turn out to be, but surely individuals having a very low intelligence and emotional-intelligence quotient; Or don’t have children at all. Please do not increase the burden on earth. Some of us are into improving ourselves and others as well, and then come those narcissists who are ALWAYS BLIND to their own faults but prefer to call that person a narcissist to whom they are meant to be accountable for their pathological actions because they are a Pro at Blame-Games. And if you don’t know where you are going wrong, seek a psychologist/psychiatrist for yourself.
Nothing annoys me more than the people who think that only one thing/one perspective exists just because they are MENTALLY BLIND to other perspectives or are doing those wrongs themselves to which they appear to be mentally blind, And then the same people sell their one directional thinking everywhere in the form of quotes and limit the thinking of other people too. Moreover, a few DUMBFUCKS think that they can influence someone’s independent and multi-perspective thinking with those quotes and through a few pages.
Do you really think that you can control someone with your limited SHIT who can think about more than ten perspectives for the same situation??
Some people will chase you only till you are interested in someone else. Their character is like that only. It satisfies their ego to get you out of love with someone else. When they succeed in doing so, it makes them feel like they are better than the one you loved or were interested in, but when they succeed in influencing your mind away from that loved person, they treat you like you never mattered. STAY WOKE ABOUT SUCH NARCISSISTS AND DON’T GIVE A FUCK TO THEM EVER, ONCE YOU HAVE A SINGLE EXPERIENCE LIKE THAT WITH ANYONE LIKE THAT.
Some women (the other party in case of a guy) be always thinking that they be winning in getting him, being completely oblivious to the fact that how relieving it has always been to me to get rid of such a nasty burden from my life. I have never competed with any such woman. I never compete in and for relationships. “The guy who is a psychopath, makes you feel once in a while like he gave himself (as a Trophy) to you, in a competition created by him, so that he can take advantage of you and the reason here is that he knows how weak you are mentally and how much you need validation even from a piece of shit like him. Thus, he keeps you tied to his little finger, pushing you n pulling your emotional strings, whenever he desires as he knows how weak you are who can dance to a tunes of his stupidity, over-cleverness n psychopathy. I may be exasperated for the fact that he be still hovering in my life directly or indirectly to influence my mind, either trying to connect back to me or just to get some attention (if not positive, then negative) or to spoil my life in any way so that he can win in his self-created one-sided competition. That exasperation which is actually due to the reason that he doesn’t get out of my life is portrayed to you that I want him but he is coming back to you, to make you look like the winner all the while thinking that you are a bloody foolish woman who is dancing to his whims n caprices or he may make you feel like his Queen/wife/love only for a short time (a very short time) until he gets another woman target or gets one back from the past who left him.”