Narcissistic Love

I am encaged in my horrific thoughts,
You are handcuffed with my love outside.
I try to scream and try to drive your attention to me,
you don’t seem to hear,
so I pull out a rage,
Being crazy in all my might
to get that attention, that affection, that love,
That seems so distant to me in my plight.
I call you names,
you are handcuffed,
I throw things at you,
you are handcuffed,
What is it made of? Steel or love?

It’s my love, my love.
Why cannot you get rid of it and see reality,
how much constrained I am right now.

Free me
I want to free myself from this cage,
Lest I would drag you alongwith me, in it, for life.
I am hating and loving those hand-cuffs simultaneously,
I want your complete surrender to my misery and plight,
Yet, stay bound with those hand-cuffs
So that they remind you of love,
that I never meant to give you

It’s just for your complete surrender

To my own horrific thoughts.

Quote: Source of mental energy of psychopaths.

Some psychopaths on internet be like “why the hell are you not fighting with me !! Aaarrrggghhh.. Who will save me now?? My energy is vanishing. I need to lick someone’s brain so badly !!”

Psychopaths gain mental energy from arguining and fighting with others. They try to suck the energy out of anyone with their toxicity whereas mentally stable people try to run away from unreasonable arguments and fights.

Lonely

I like it when you are lonely. That is my favourite place for you. When we first meet if you make mention of feeling lonely, or send a self-pitying tweet decrying your loneliness then I am straight on to you. You may as well have taken a knife to your chest, slit it open […]

Lonely

The exact thinking of a narcissist. I have not seen a single victim whose friends or family have not been reached by a narc or whom narc did not surround with his own friend circle. You can actually visualise a normal innocent person standing inside of a circle of a narc’s friends, unable to escape ever. The boundary of the enclosure is adjusted according to the behaviour of the victim. If the victim acts according to the narc, giving him all the narcissistic supply, then the area of the circle is widened, so that the victim can feel like having freedom. But be wary, it is just a false sense of freedom, the victim just doesn’t know where the boundary is set by the narc but slowly and steadily (which may take years) the victim starts feeling that something is wrong, like somebody is pushing triggering buttons and pulling emotional strings when the victim does anything with a free will. Some victims never get to know who that person is. Those who get to know are then discarded by the narc in ways incomprehensible and shocking ways (a different topic) to the victim like a rug got pulled out below the feet. If the victim is impressive to everyone but meek, coy and obedient to the narcissist, this is the perfect dynamic to the narc. If somebody does not show off or others do not know about their achievements, then discarding happens instantly. If somebody is impressive to others and the narc as well, then Love Bombing (a different topic) begins in the initial stages to attract the victim; in the later stages, to pull the victim back into that enclosure of narc and his flying monkeys. Beware, some so-called flying monkeys do not even know that they are being so. Some may be genuine people intricately manipulated by the narc and his similar narcissist allies (different topic). The victims do not get to know from where they are being attacked mentally, emotionally and sometimes physically as well, that’s gaslighting (different topic). Gaslighting the victim inside that enclosure is the perfect dynamic in which either narc can control the victim completely by giving a little bit of attention or affection by himself or by his flying monkeys here and there; or during devaluation the victim is called “crazy” or “psychopath” or “anti-social” or will be called names whatever can work to hit the psyche of the victim to make the victim feel lonely, that too, IN WAYS IN WHICH ANY THIRD PERSON CANNOT KNOW THAT IT’S THE NARC WHO IS SAYING ALL THAT (Hiding his identity during all the criminalistic and psychopathic activities is a narcissist’s biggest trait), and then all those flying monkeys are pulled back in order to make the victim that there is something wrong in their behaviour and to make the victim feel lonely. Even if the victim asks a few of the allies of narc on suspicion of something wrong happening, they try to shun off the victim’s voice and ask “WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU??” No wonder the victim will be called crazy for hundreds of times, but Never Publically because that will actually spoil the Fake Image maintained by the narcissist and those who have been helping him under the guise of his fake image will stop helping him for controlling the victim. The whole idea is to control the victim anyhow so that due to loneliness, the victim runs to the narcissist most of the times for support (or to his flying monkeys).

ADVICE:

●Take the cues of being manipulated. Observe when some of your near and dear ones begin to act out of their character that you used to know before.

●Observe keenly before and after what action of whom you get to have reactions from whom and with what tone.

●Observe who jokes in what tone at what time and who questions you about which things (what is unacceptable to you is the key here).

●VERY IMPORTANT: Talk to a trusted family member, as well as a friend, and if possible (which is the best option) talk to a psychotherapist ept in behavioural therapies and who knows about narcissism as well.

●Talk about it openly. Break the chain/circle created by the narcissist around you. Do not trust anyone unless and until somebody tells you the truth that you want to know. Test them by asking about things that you already know and you know that they also know, then you’ll know who is lying and is a part of that circle.

●Do not care about your image. They are still a very few people who maintain a fake image, and you are real. The world is quite big, you will find your tribe some day.

●Once you know who is the culprit and who are the allies, do not change your mind of removing those people from your life. The narcissist never changes as it is an incurable mental disease. Some fluctuations may occur with time and circumstances but that’s about it; the allies are either narcissists themselves, not that much to you though and even in case they are not narcs, they are not your well-wishers, they are narc’s friends, and those who became his allies under the guise of his innocense cannot be trusted as they can be easily manipulated by anyone and as a result can help anyone in manipulating you as well.

●Stay strong. It’s okay to be alone than being in a bad company. Weak people are often found in groups. Even if your precious time got ruined in the narcissistic cycle, it’s still better than ruining your whole life by going back to the same people undeserving of anything from your side.

(First published on 27th sept, 2020)

Jealous Ugly Aunty

Posted on a page I follow on fb to provoke me.

It’s always that one Ugly Aunty (ugly by face 🤮 and uglier by soul 🤮🤮) who thinks that your pictures are edited just because that Bitch is burning with envy. Oh..that ugly aunty is a male by nature’s fault.

“Keep burning. I can’t change my face to match your shit-ass ugly face. 🤢🤢 Nor I am going to give any proof in the form of a new click to accept or contradict your toxic provocation. Stay A Bitch. Nobody gives a Fuck. 🤡”

Curse on yourself.

Your Jealousy will take you nowhere

but 3 feet down

under the ground,

With the heaviness of misery

on your cursed weak spirit

heavier than ten thousand pound.

(You are up for the biggest downfalls of your entire life. Keep being a jealous bitch. 👍

PS- A BITCH is gender neutral. I may be calling a male a Bitch because he is a Bitch in reality.)

(16th March,22)

Stupid Narcissistic Bitch

Thinking of One Ugly Narcissistic Bitch- “Either you will be with me or you will stay single forever.”

Me-“Okay..Tell me one more joke, Hoe-ass Stupid Bitch.”

Loud is mostly a reaction, real abuse and provocation is mostly secret, silent, and in the cues..

(20th April, 2021)

Manipulative person’s dislike.

A manipulator narcissist dislikes/hates someome with high Self-respect, because the latter leaves the time the former’s game of manipulation and triangulation is suspected and that person refuses to be a part of that drama and mind-play.

If your happiness relies on this one thing..

If your happiness depends on someone else’s life’s events, actions n reactions AND what they write or do on social media, you are really fooling yourself. People do and say anything to get others engaged with their profiles. You be thinking that they have put their whole life n reality on social media accounts, whereas the reality may be completely the opposite as well as something that you can never apprehend.

Also, if you are happy just because someone else wrote something negative and/or some sad words, trust me, nobody is more pathetic and narcissistic than you, because it means that you love to suck others’ good energy and find pleasure in their bad/low times. Even if it satisfies you for a short-term, for the long run, you won’t get anything good and substancial in life, and you are actually and inherently a very miserable person.

(21st Dec, 2021)

Do Narcissists VENT?

I love it when narcissists Vent openly on social media, for a small fraction of time, it feels like tables have turned. The way the victims want to talk their heart out, wanting others to know what they are going through or have gone through, and still being unable to let it all out because the intensity of the abuse they feel is unmatched with any words or any expression of it, it finally feels, that the relentless banter or the self-expression or uncontrolled trail of arguments by the narcissists against the psychologists or against the people who want to enlighten others against narcissism and bullying, is the way of narcissists for venting it all out about what they have or had gone through.

But.. Let me clear this. It’s a HOAX. Narcissists never vent. They do not have that much emotional depth in them. They do not think straight about how others may or may not feel about them. Actually, narcissists have nothing to do with what effect they may have upon anyone because of their actions. They love to abuse secretly. All of their so-called venting out is just a form of manipulation, the manipulation for everyone to see how bad or evil is a psychologist who has been making innocent people aware of the nature of a narcissist, and the trial of manipulation of the psychologist himself/herself so that they may think that the narc is innocent. So, narcissists do not truly vent regarding the real implication of the word, they just make it look like venting to gather attention and divert others’ attention from the real venting of the victim(s).

(26th Oct, 2021)

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