Abstract digital art..

“Inexplicable roots of connection between two souls” -My Interpretation About This Painting.

I will be very glad to know how you are going to perceive it. This is one of my most abstract paintings which I just painted within seconds (maybe it took one minute) and didn’t even think for once what I was doing or what I was intending to do; so, there is some unconscious n subconscious meaning behind it.

(First published on 19th July, 2021)

Just Ignore.

I am

Getting into

N

O

Relationship

Ever.

Law of attraction in summation.

You attract your own energy, nothing from the outside. If you do not know your worth, you attract people who consider you worthless. If you do not want something to work for you, you won’t get it. If you have some traits in your subconscious mind for a partner, every other kind of person will be repelled/removed from your life sooner or later. If you want to change yourself, you have to visualize that change in you. If you want to become something, you have to believe it in your whole being. That’s all law of attraction is. You attract your energy, your thoughts, your vibes, your aura to you.
Now, a few of you may think “I am a healer. Usually toxic people get attracted to me. I don’t think this is how law of attraction works. I never wanted that.”
My answer is your innate nature is that of a healer and toxic people need spiritual healing and your mind subconsciously desires somebody to heal, so, toxic people get attracted to you unknowingly. But you can save yourself by creating boundaries n by directing your energy to be more specific to heal yourself first or the innocent victims of toxic abusers or nobody at all particularly and by only teaching people how to heal themselves.

(8th jan, 2021)

Learning to fly…..

You may as well,
To save yourself from drowning in marshy waters,
Want to learn to fly.
💞

(Originally posted on 6th jan,2021)

Reminiscing my nature.

I can’t even explain how I think. Many live in and for experiences. I really don’t seek them. I don’t seek events to make memories about them. I don’t think that we are what we create or some experiences can create us (ok particularly me here). How I take experiences is purely the mental stimulators or catalysts for different thinking. As far as I remember nothing has changed me much. Those who know me now or at whatever period of time they might have known me may think that I have changed a lot. But that’s not true. They have only seen my behaviour for a short period of time n for a few events or so on but my basic nature has always been like this only.

I was always quiet in front of the outsiders (school, college, relatives functions, strangers etc.) and quiet in my own home maybe for eternity.. but.. whenever I wanted to socialise I was one hella fun person. I was always the one who organised family functions to the T (not the labour part, ok). I was always sporty whenever anyone came to the house (n got comfy in the family) to play a game or two. I made jokes whenever I observed something laugh-worthy in the surroundings. I was analysing situations, people’s behaviour and dynamics of different kinds right from my very childhood (like since the age of 6-7 years old). I always observed a lot. Like really.. I can very confidently say that I filter about 95-98% of things that I observe just because I find them quite useless including people who think that they can always sneak, tresspass, abuse n escape.. “Nope ! You didn’t. I did let you because you are not important at all.” If you think that I have become angrier, that too, is in my nature by birth, though the outlets have changed. I used to store it all or tended to flush off that energy by playing cricket for two hours daily in the evening (though with my brother n father only). It was really a good release of energy then. Now I feel like not storing any shit in my mind n release it all through words. If we talk about confidence. I always had a very good amount of self-confidence but I was always quiet about it because I was getting regular recognition about my capability through professors n results etc. Now I have to show it in other ways because of the wake of social media as in this era if you don’t verbalise or show your capabilities, then you are considered not to have them at all and those who are ept at showing off, become successful, though they might have half of your capabilities.

The point is.. I was always more or less similar..Not much has changed.. Neither my nature, nor my strength.. It’s just that those who have started to know different sides of me or my deeper layers, they think that I have changed a lot; they actually never knew me. Really.. Never..

Strangest thing about me: I do the things, I hate to do, the most. This one I still cannot understand why. Sooner or later, I end up doing things that I really hate.

Strongest point about me: I really, and by this I mean REALLY, I don’t give a fuck about who thinks what about me.

Weakest point about me: I won’t actualise something until I have done it to perfection, exactly the way I visualised it, and even after reaching that point I keep polishing it so that it can reach a point to my utmost satisfaction.

The best thing I find about my life: No matter how filthy situations, events or people I deal with, my bounce back game is strong AF, stronger than many, and I don’t mean it by the show off part, I mean it about things considered valuable.

(Originally posted on 28th Dec, 2020)

Fight for your right.

A war outside of you

is worthy

when it calms down a war within you.

(28th Oct, 2020)

Quote: Good behaviour.

When you are faking good behaviour, your mask eventually falls.

(I am much better than that fakeness. What you see is what I am. I don’t fake goodness to collect people to talk on my behalf. I have the guts to call shit out and own my fights that I do not even initiate.)

Top reasons for why I am difficult.

Why people find me too difficult to deal with:

1. I don’t get impressed with anything.

2. I don’t let anyone validate/control me.

3. I protect my boundaries like nothing else.

4. I am mostly on my own, about 99% of the times, and thus never afraid to live completely alone.

5. My mind catches their bullshit (if any) quicker than they can think of, although I don’t let them know about it longer they can think and I don’t fall into emotional trap as I am basically and generally an emotionally detached person.

And, this is healthy. This is way too healthy for confused and mentally unhealthy people that I get to know, and those who can maintain this level of these traits in their own personality do never or rarely find me difficult.

(2nd Aug, 2020)

Quote-Vibes matter the most.

I am naturally high-vibing. It’s quite obvious to me who lowers that down at what time. I am being more and more cautious about that now.

(Original date: 31st March,2021)

Free-bird.

My sense of independence is my biggest fetter

I rebel where most people won’t

And cooperate where most people don’t

Because I want something different

Different from what they know n what they are used to

I want something unexplored

Where they will never let me go n do what I intend to do

So I stay away

Pushing everyone away

Because I want to breath, think, feel and do everything freely

As you can’t control air

And if you do it turns into a storm

I do the same

And break every chain to stay free

But my sense of freedom fetters me

It doesn’t let me come close to anyone

Bcz I don’t want to be controlled with their judgements

I just want to live n love freely.

(First published on 25th aug, 2020)

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