How OCD and depression exist together and feel??

Depression alongwith aggravated OCD makes one feel hyper-alert while having no energy to be alert about anything. One has no desire to know anything anymore yet stays busy to correct something which one doesn’t even know what is wrong or the wrong which actually doesn’t exist.

Why would you count things, literally every single little thing as little as your breathing, to correct something that has nothing to do with it?? What would you correct that isn’t even wrong in the first place??

The anticipation of something to go wrong is the reason behind OCD; something that someone holds very dearly or important in one’s life, and if that thing has gone wrong multiple times in the past, then the person becomes extra cautious or obsessed or say moves into hyper-mode of anxiety about it. It’s frustrating and utterly exhausting, both mentally and physically.

Don’t tell me meditation n shit helps in this. It is a problem of rationalizing irrational thoughts and attaching irrational behaviour (compulsions) to those irrational thoughts by somehow rationalizing them after observing patterns between them.

Add depression to it; And you have enormous amount of inner conflict while you have no energy or desire to even do the bare minimum of daily life, and sometimes even breathing and staying awake feels like a burden to the mind.

Loud is mostly a reaction, real abuse and provocation is mostly secret, silent, and in the cues..

(20th April, 2021)

A genuine advice..

Please learn and then teach your kids the meaning of accountability, otherwise they will grow up as narcissists who feel entitled to talk shit by going to anyone’s account and upon being called up for their psychopathy, will laugh and try to blame that person to whom they were meant to be accountable. I cannot even describe how much incapable they will turn out to be, but surely individuals having a very low intelligence and emotional-intelligence quotient; Or don’t have children at all. Please do not increase the burden on earth. Some of us are into improving ourselves and others as well, and then come those narcissists who are ALWAYS BLIND to their own faults but prefer to call that person a narcissist to whom they are meant to be accountable for their pathological actions because they are a Pro at Blame-Games. And if you don’t know where you are going wrong, seek a psychologist/psychiatrist for yourself.

QUOTE ANALYSIS..

Be kind, because you don’t know what somebody is going through in their life.

Please give upon the idea that somebody has to suffer in other areas of their life, so that the mental leeches can pause their toxicity from affecting that person. Reading “Be kind, because you don’t know what somebody is going through in their life” just feels like you are begging narcissists and psychopaths to pause their non-sense or give someone the permission to live. No ! This is really wrong. Actually, “be kind or not to anyone but don’t be unkind to anyone for no reason” should be abided by as a norm. Narcissists and mental leeches do interfere in anyone’s life and talk shit about anyone’s life for no reason because it gives them cheap thrills. One really doesn’t have to ask them to stop doing that non-sense. It’s in their blood, in their psyche. Their soul is evil. They won’t stop for the sake of humanity. They will pause their shit because you asked them to give permission to someone to live their life, and as it will enhance their ego, they will stop for a while and continue with their psychopathic behaviour again when they will see that person living their life normally. Envy comes natural to such miserable people. So, this kind of words never work with narcissists, psychopaths, mental leeches, and energy vampires. And no ! They are not going to change for you, for your words, or for anyone. They are mentally sick to the point of being criminals, and that’s about it !

Convincing my mind- Speaking Up.

A lot of the times, I have to make my own mind convinced that those who have not studied Law, don’t get the Principle of Things as much as those who have studied it, and those who have not studied psychology really cannot understand the tactics of manipulation, realness and worn mask for Image Maintenance; And those who have studied both, really know the means and effects of PROVOCATION.

So yeah, people can Bitch about me behind my back, take the wrong side all the time or be toxic to me despite me suffering the dirty mind games of someone else, Still, in the end, I find contentment in that my Character is much much stronger than anyone’s fake image.

Anyone who has studied n has experience in both of these can straight up tell the difference.

And, coming onto social and peer pressure, I am an acer at standing alone and against the crowd who doesn’t get the principle of things.

If even after me suffering from mental turmoil and offended boundaries and being Provoked continuously, anyone is going to call me Toxic for reacting to the Shit a Bitch was throwing at me, those who Bitch behind my Back are also the same Toxic Bitches, they never know better and are only happy in their own Delusioned Little World of Fake Ass Shit !!

Nevermind ! I know how to handle such Bitches who first waste my time and energy and then ACT like the Goody-Good to gain validation and sympathy only, when I try to return their Trash Energy. ALAS ! returning that toxic shit is too Taxing on my mental n physical health. I am sure that such a Bitch has nothing important to do in her life, but My Every Single Minute Is Valuable as only I know what it entails to me.

(Original posting date: 20th april,2021)

Their completely unreasonable behaviour making me feel helpless-Family Frustration.

Do you ever feel completely annoyed and helpless because of your own family?? What if anything if ever you ask them to do is take care of themselves properly?? If one of them is unwell, that one does not allow you, (I mean it, DOES NOT ALLOW YOU) to take care of them, although you know they are unwell because they appear to be so and they themselves tell you that.

They do not change their ways. They will do Completely unnecessary physical work like going to the park at the noon time when it’s quite dry n hot weather, although they may have been going through dehydration. They do not eat properly, nor take nutrition supplements, and say that it’s hard for them to eat as their stomach(digestive system) is not allowing them to eat anything, AND still do not seek medical help from any good doctor. They do not drink water properly. They do not take proper rest staying at home, NOPE, staying at home is a big issue for them, no matter how caring you become or how lovingly you tell them to take proper rest and nutrition.

It is stubborn AF behaviour. They do not consider your life at all. They do not even think once how much stress it gives you, probably to the point of severe depression after which you just become occupied mentally with their well-being only, and cannot do what you need to do about your own life, although they do the dramebaazi all the time that they love you. I don’t think that they love you at all, all they seek is they be considered an unsung hero who lost their life for you, loving you only immensely and never cared about their own health, despite the fact that it’s you who has always been concerned about their health and take care of yourself properly so that they do not have to go through any such mental pressure or depression.

Upon confrontation what they say is “do not care about me”. You think that it is possible that whom you love, you would not care about them or their health?? Can you think how much heaviness you feel mentally because of such ignorant and immature behaviour?? I cannot describe enough how much helpless you can feel in such a situation when they create a whole bunch of problems and mental anxiety and depression in you which would not have happened just in case they would take care of themselves like a Normal Person does because really, they do not even have any physical incurable ailment. It’s all because of their fucking reckless behaviour that they spoil their life and yours as well.

What if they have been specially warned to take care of themselves by an astrologer because their time is not right whole of the year and you are concerned and extra cautious for that as well??

Despite that, they will still give no fuck or change their habits or behaviour even a bit.

Why?? Most probably because they have nothing good to do in life rather than creating a mess out of completely controllable circumstances. Is it too much to ask someone to take care of their health properly or let you take care of it?? I don’t care if you agree to me or not, but it is a form of Mental Cruelty.

Mind your nose n mouth !!

I have heard people blabbering a lot about my life and actions,

Do you ever see me peeking in or poking my nose in anyone’s business??

“Your big mouths need to shut up

brains need to be opened up, actually gotta be bigger

And nose be put in its place!!”

(Originally posted on 17th oct,2020)

(Some people never learn a thing, specially this.)

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