NOTE TO SELF..

Just understand that everybody cannot be like you. People cannot have values like you have, they cannot have standards of good virtues in their blood and thus not in their behaviour. They are weak as fuck. They don’t know how to be accountable for their actions. They barely know how to behave. They will take advantage of your goodness, suck your good energy and when you feel low after knowing about what kind of shit they are, they will try to make you feel like there is some problem in you. This is not the first time it is happening in your life. You have seen such psychopaths before and have gotten out of those troubles. Your strength and character is incomparable, and believe it or not, they are subconsciously envious of you that how you pick yourself up without any help every single time. They want to make you weak. They want to take credits in your life, so that, when you attain something new they can either grab it or put you down that you didn’t give them Everything for the little crumbs they gave you here and there. But I know you will never do the same to them. You are self-sufficient. You are strong as fuck. You do things on your own and take both successes and failures as your own. You know how to love immensely. You love yourself and you can love others as well; you have even the worst of creatures, the fucking energy vampires.. What you really need to learn is how to Kick Those Motherfuckers out of your life Forever. You need to learn how not to let your goodness overpower your rationale for standing for yourself. You need to learn how not let your love be given to anybody who was always WORTHLESS of it. You need to learn how to keep those psychopathic motherfucker in their place so that they can never even imagine how to approach you or have say in what you do and do not do. You need to put yourself first every single time, no matter what.

Preferences.

I would rather die of eating chocolates than depression,

Of loving too much than not loving at all,

Of reading too much useful n useless stuff than ignorance,

Of over-thinking than under-working brain,

Of intensity than a dull life that others train.

Bigger reason.

If you have asked yourself many a times, like me,

“Why am I alive??”

Your life has been a hell

But also

Your life is going to be a blessing for others,

Focus on your higher purpose,

You are not made to live for yourself only,

You will get a good answer to the WHY some day.

Constant.

They fear change

I fear status quo,

Imagine anyone had a choice not to grow.

BATTLES.

I was used to choosing my battles very wisely,

Till the time people began to take my silence, humility n modesty for me as a fool,

Now I feel like running all over those battles and those people

Ending them completely useless n worthless

Till I collect my cool.

My man.. ❤

I would want my partner to gain n lose weight whenever he would want to, I want to love him in all the shapes n sizes; Cute chubby or cute lean, tanned hot or not, rough or soft skinned; my man will be loved n he will always matter..

Eating healthy.

Those who say they eat healthy will eat a sandwich from a restaurant loaded with mayonnaise and grilled with a lot of butter.

“Just because it’s called a sandwich, not a samosa, it’s healthier for them.”

Wholesome.

Flustered by feelings

I kept searching for something to calm down my reelings,

But all in vain

They kept on peaking it to the highest range

Letting it never to end

It had no sealing

But then I found

What I was searching for

was within me

Always in me.

Mouths in business.

It’s amusing to know that I either am accepting of other peoples’ ways

or I simply don’t give a fuck,

But about all of my ways, behaviour and choices

Numerous mouths begin to quack like a dumb ass duck.

(MY LIFE, MY RULES.)

Unhealthy relationships- Deal breakers.

Deal breakers in any relationship:

Trying to trigger insecurity.

Trying to make jealous.

Running away to someone else whenever it gets tough to stay.

Being unapologetic and unreasonable together for a single action.

Disrespecting over and over again.

Questioning and judging every action of other that goes against one’s advantageous position.

Non-reciprocity.

Dishonesty and disloyalty.

Degrading and provoking other despite one being faulty first.

Playing single despite being in a relationship.

Triangulation by comparing them with a third party.

Manipulation.

Gaslighting.

Inconsistency for a long time; on and off many a times.

Blame-game by blaming them for things that one actually does to them and against them secretly.

Creating confusion in other’s mind to take advantage of the situation.

If any of these incidents happen more that twice, it’s that person’s personality and not a mistake. You need to cut off such person from your life. You do not need that kind of toxicity, in order to function properly. Let them be all that you don’t want in your life, and give upon the idea of changing them. Nothing can change somebody who is comfortable in doing something for a long period of time and if it results into your disavantage-physical, mental, emotional and/or social, then that person is a liability and a burden on you, and no amount of your love, respect, loyalty, honesty, free spirit, achievements or cooperation is going to change them. Please give up and live your life peacefully.