When you are used to present a good humoured self in front of others, others think that you don’t feel any pain, but, nevertheless, it’s a great way to deal with any kind of pain/injury/wounds. Only the strong ones have this capacity.
I am sorry if you stay in flight or fight mode and also think that it’s your fault. Just a friendly reminder that it’s not your fault and you also can feel safe. Just change the people around you and choose the right ones who can make you feel safe physically and mentally.
I had the need to heal somebody, so I used to choose someone as a partner who needed immense healing; and now I get it that actually I needed that healing for myself.
So now, I can share any kind of emotion, good n bad, but I really don’t need another Healing Project.
I want a Partner. I want true Love. I want forever friendship and love, both in one person.
Love never lies,
Love is not blind..
This is a blessing,
Only one of its kind.
If anybody got offended by my last post, it only means that either they were finding pleasure and validation in my pain, which by any means is toxic, or they are over-analysing what I write. In both the cases, they need to find their mental balance and stop being overly reactionary.
PS- I am not giving any explanation about my behaviour here as I do not owe it to anyone for what I write. I am just trying to reflect on people’s reactivity so that they can heal on their own by self-evaluation.
“Right in the middle of chaos,
When the eyes lose their dreams,
When the mind will be shattered,
When the soul will feel like flying away from your body,
When the blood will be cold,
When the sun will feel eclipsed,
When the winds will turn into storms,
When the hills will be melting,
When there will be no hope,
I’ll meet you there”, he said,
The one who wants to hold me tight,
And wants to win for me any fight,
with that selfless love,
My imaginary lover;
My darkness would haunt me with these thoughts
The thoughts of my past..
With a hope in my heart
To find hope and love in someone else forever.
There is no mess, storm and darkness,
My blood is free flowing,
My soul is pure,
I am my own cure,
My mind full of light and existence glowing;
I am glad that I found my love,
Within me, for me, forever. ❤
Not afraid anymore,
About feeling too much,
About being feelingless,
About accepting and telling my truth,
About disappointing those who deserve to be disappointed,
About my future,
About my telling my traumas,
About my weaknesses,
About showing my strength,
About standing up for myself,
About putting myself first,
About letting people go,
About throwing off negativity to its source,
About doing whatever the fuck I want to do,
Not Afraid Anymore.
Healing is not easy, moving on is not easy. Your feelings can hit you anytime like a bull hitting you with his horns all out of a sudden. You feel drained again. You feel like fainting, like life should not exist anymore. You don’t feel like doing anything. You don’t even feel like thinking about it anymore but you realize a void suddenly. But it’s okay. You have gone through it before. You can pass through it once again. No darkness can exist for long when you have the capability to shine from within. Just like plants take time to grow, self-love requires time to heal those wounds; you have sown the seeds and are watering them daily, that’s enough for now. You don’t need to see the results right away. You just have to keep going, staying strong.