Do you ever see someone in your dream in the morning, his vibe so good and pure with you in that dream that your whole day is spent pretty smoothly thereafter??
My maths class was about to get over. It was raining heavily. I missed getting myself marked present in class. I went to staff room and requested the professor that I was solving a maths problem, so just missed my roll call. Professor was adamant at not marking me ‘present’ at first but finally marked so.
I was enjoying watching the rain, pouring down heavily thumping at the ground, from the corridors of the first floor. He was not present today. I don’t know why but it was a disappointment. I usually love it when he is present the days I come to school as then I get to see him. Anyway, it’s okay, I thought. I untied my hair as it was the last period of the entire session and it was, in a way, quite relieving. I was reminiscing the good times I spent in the place and planning on how to study for the final exams. Nothing was wrong but something was missing, really missing. There was quiteness in the corridor as most of my fellow students had left. I didn’t realise that I was standing there for about fifteen minutes by now. Then, came a classmate to me in a hurry and said “come with me downstairs, he is waiting for you”. It was perplexing at first as I was not used to this kind of behaviour in school. I never hurried before this. But this time, it didn’t feel wrong, infact, it felt like something was so right. I didn’t even ask him who he was talking about, I just ran with that fellow to go downstairs. And then, there he was..yes, it was him ! for whom my my eyes n soul were searching.
…..After this what happened, I really don’t want to even write. It was everything I could wish for…..
She was standing there in her favourite brown suit and shawl below the house where she used to live when I was a kid- the place I used to go to daily at night, her home. I was sleeping inside the room, not wanting to look outside, having a gut feeling like there was something wrong, something paranormal and when I peeped through the varandah, she was there, just standing.. with no expression, no noise, no demands..just standing in the mid of night, in the cold, still existing even after losing her existence.
…..And then I woke up.
That one tip tracing my every nerve
Pushing me closer to the heaven
Leaving a trail
Making a map,
Of his desire
Over my flushed skin
And ruling my mind
Leaving between us
You know how it feels to lose control?
I got to know that in those moments
When we could say anything with no bounds
No filter in our talks,
Or I say I found it more
When you made with your teeth those marks?
Two hot cups of coffee,
Breeze cooling through the drizzling rain
Touching you calming down your skin
My hand entwined with your hand
A beautiful smile on your face
Soothing my soul
While we snuggle under the blanket
skin to skin…..
Not cruxed with ebony n ivory,
I want a surreal eccentric art,
Where decor with plants will suffice,
A home of people with big heart.
Call me stone-hearted ass
But about it I don’t care
Because I know that’s what I become
After my immense love is taken for granted
And situations converted to my agony.
But believe it or not
I can feel others’ feelings
But I don’t want to do anything about it
Because I know if I will do
That will just put us all through the same hurricane
From which we all got out
After so much time, difficulty and pain.
It is one of those dreams, those vivid ones that I can feel in real and see or feel very clearly. I am feeling joy, excitement and awkwardness all at the same time sharing it here. I saw it between 4-5 am because I got up at 5 am. I see this kind of energetically real dreams very less but with more or less modification they come true or at least energetically whatever their significance or vibe is, it turns into reality.
Okay, so, coming to the dream real quick. I am in a different place than my native one, probably a village but that’s probably near delhi (I saw the dream with the same topic and same energetic vibe in delhi a few months ago also). I went to a gurudwara, probably Bangla Sahib, did a few general rituals related to prayers that are done in sikhism. In the next flash, I am with somebody with whom I got married without anyone’s knowledge and we are in a village (vibe was either of a village near delhi or somewhere in maharashtra or kerela, I cannot point out exactly because it was a vibe and I cannot explain this kind of dreams too well with surety but they feel so real) hiding from a group of people, probably the people from his side or against him (a group definitely related to him only and we are hiding because of our marriage). That group is not dangerous but we have to hide, I don’t know why, but probable reason is it’s an inter-religion marriage; and I have no idea what his religion is. We probably did court marriage. Now, we are lying closely together, snuggled, I told him, “I am afraid constantly that they will find us.” A bus arrives outside the room in which there are a few people. He says, “don’t worry even if they come, we are together. I have loved you since forever.” I am not lying I have waited for someone to say this to me whole of my life and I am listening to it from somebody who has already become mine (but under a fear?), that’s a beautifully strange feeling of both security and insecurity, pure love and eternal togetherness. Then one by one people have begun coming to us and who are they? First of all enters one of my aunts, with prasad (a religious offering) in her hands, brought from a far off religious place, and she gave both of us blessings and said, “finally, you both have gotten married. I cannot describe my happiness in words. Stay blessed. Stay happy. Stay together.” Okay, so maybe we had aquainted my family that we had gotten married and were staying at that place. Then came my another two aunts, one happy and another’s vibe I could not infer; and then entered one of my college friends from the law college, happy and congratulating me; one south indian hindu priest with a bowl of parsadam, which he hands over to me, and I eat it. I ask my husband where his portion was, to which the priest said that that it was for women only because of the particular ingredients, it is not suitable for men (I have no idea of ‘what and why’ about it because I have never heard of anything like that, I look at him with disbelief and little confusion in my mind about why did I eat it). Then one of my aunts tells me that she has informed his family also and they must be arriving soon. We both(him and I) look at each-other, with a look of anticipation about their reactions but I am sure that that group about which we are afraid is not his family, that’s some outsider group that is against our marriage whereas our families just did not know that we got married. Probably we are going to get married again according to rituals of both of our religions, in the presence of our families.
How and where the marriage happened, I could not see that. I could not even see his face. It was purely a feeling. I know that person, I am so sure that I know him but I don’t know yet who he is because I could not see his face, I could only feel him. You know that feeling when souls get so connected that the looks don’t matter anymore, that kind of feeling; but it was so real. I don’t even know if I have met that person or not, the vibe was just that- a known person, friend or stranger, I don’t know the face or whereabouts of him but I know him. And, by the time I got up, there was no fear of that particular group, just an aching need to know my future partner with whom I have gotten energetically eternally connected, and a beautiful feeling that it is going to be strange and messy in the beginning but our union will continue beautifully. And it is definitely going to be a love marriage.
Strange but a beautiful dream.