I won’t lie; there have been too much pressure on me.. of career, exams, relationship(or say no relationship), physical health in terms of weight management n chronic headache, depression n anxiety being episodic in the alternative, and the pandemic load on people is over-whelming to say the least..Seriously, for the past couple of days I just could not get over the pain people are going through…..But one thing that I am loving about myself is.. I. AM. NOT. GIVING. UP. I may cry out all the stress away.. I may feel like I have no plan as whatever I had been planning was slipping through my hands just like the time. I might be feeling completely empty, like really empty.. But something in me keeps on pushing forward. I won’t like to make it sound fancy by saying that I have become super productive.. That’s not the case at all.. I just try to do something productive whenever I can.. be it for an hour or two in the whole day.. Depression is like that only. It doesn’t let you live freely.. You feel like you have been fettered with heavy chains on your whole body, most of all, on your head.. you feel like you have been drowned in mushy water, you are being suffocated to death, whether you can feel it extremely or be completely empty or have such episodes in between, and you find no way out of those dirty waters..sometimes, you don’t even realize you are drowning in that grief, sadness and heaviness.. Hmm.. What can I say now, I just got lost in that feeling.. yeahh..coming back to the on-going pandemic, I cannot describe enough how much it has been taxing on all of us, specially when we see people in complete state of chaos and misery, and the inhuman treatment the poor n covid affected are facing, which they definitely do not deserve.. I could not stop myself from crying looking at those posts n could feel what they are going through.. truly felt helpless about them.. so helpless that I forgot why I was feeling helpless about my own personal life.. But then.. I remember my purpose, which is actually, to work for the betterment of people, not in the way dictated by others, but in my own way, whenever I can, and surely in the future..Only that purpose keeps me going.. Even if I cannot get up sometimes, I prefer to crawl.. I guess, that’s how I am made and that’s what I am made for..

Author: Angry Bird

A dope soul and deep mind with a hot temper.

6 thoughts on “Heart-talk-Depression.”

  1. Hi. I can understand.
    I have lost family too this week in pandemic despite putting in every effort. But such circumstances cannot stop one from getting out of dirty water for oneself. So, breathe a little and keep doing your bit. I loved the way you end it. There is hope and life and it will prevail.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Oh.. I am so sorry about your family.. I won’t ask you questions about it right now, but please feel free to talk whenever you find it okay to share.. I can feel your pain..
      But your courage is commendable to be hopeful about life.. More strength to you.. ❤❤


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: